"No bath!": songs that turn bath time into a game

A bath time song works best as a game you play with your toddler: the same tune, the same order, one body part at a time. It gives the bath a beginning and an end. It does not replace you, and the one rule never changes: the AAP says never to leave a young child alone in the bath, even for a moment.

The great bath standoff

Your two year old was happily stacking blocks. You say “bath time.” The blocks suddenly matter more than anything in the world. You pick them up and now they are stiff as a board, or boneless on the floor, and the water is getting cold. Half an hour later the same child will refuse to get out.

Each step along the way is a small argument, and it is tiring to win them one at a time. Add a shampoo that got in someone’s eye last week, and the whole bath starts to feel like a negotiation.

Why play often beats orders

The psychiatrist Daniel Siegel and the psychotherapist Tina Bryson recommend reconnecting and changing the mood through movement and fun. For little ones they suggest a loving trick: in one of their examples, a mother turns getting dressed into a jump for each piece of clothing, instead of giving orders and threats. They say moving the body is a powerful way to change a mood, and that the fun is part of the effect. They also say that the feeling comes first. If your child is truly upset, acknowledge that before you try anything playful.

They are not writing about bath songs. The bath is our own application of the idea: if dressing can be a game, so can getting washed. We cannot promise that a song will make bath time smooth. Some days it simply will not work.

How to use a song tonight

• Start before the tub. Sing on the way to the bathroom, so the song is the signal.
• Give each verse one job. Head, face, arms, hands, knees, feet. It is a washing order they can learn.
• Let them answer. Leave gaps for a shout, a splash or a bark.
• Let them do something. Hold the cloth, choose the next part, pour a cup of water on their own knees.
• Sing the same ending. “Turn off the water, see you next time” says it is over.

If shampoo once scared them, talk about it. The two authors explain that telling a hard moment in order helps a child, and that a mention can be playful with little ones. “Remember when the soap got in your eye? You yelled! Then we rinsed it, and it stopped.” Our suggestion is to do this outside the tub, on a calm day.

The safety part

This comes straight from the AAP’s HealthyChildren.org, and a song changes none of it:

• Never leave a young child alone in the bath, even for a moment. Children can drown in only a few inches of water.
• Bath seats and rings are bathing aids. They will not prevent drowning if the child is left unattended.
• The hottest temperature at the faucet should be no more than 120 degrees Fahrenheit (48.9 Celsius).

So play the song on something you have put within reach before the bath starts, or just sing it yourself.

Mariano’s bath song

¡Al agua, pato! is Mariano’s song for the tub, in Spanish, marching from head to toe with splashes and echoes. There is no English version yet, but the words are simple and the barks need no translation. Listen here.

Tonight, ask your child: “What should we wash first?”